Gustave’s diary entry Tuesday, 2 February

Tuesday, 2 February

Bon, It’s Gustave again, here with my friend, Nhar. You are wondering what happened with the branch of the tree (you can read our diary from Monday, 1 February if you want to know what I am talking about). Well, it start to crack. We can see the white part of the wood in the center of the branch, it separate slowly from itself. It smell quite good and pine-fresh. The air in Switzerland, it is quite nice.

Just before Nhar and myself we fall completely and tumble to the ground and break all our bones, a helicopter it fly by and drop us a rope ladder. Nhar he go first, and then I grab the ladder with one hand while the branch of the tree it fall away and it crash to the forest floor. Nhar, he help me to climb the rest of the way up the ladder.

The guy in the helicopter, his name is Alibek. He is from the city of Almaty, in Kazakhstan. He say, he is going to Kazakhstan. If we want to go with him to Kazakhstan, that’s OK, and if we want to go somewhere else, then we can go with him to Kazakhstan and then we can take a bus or a plane somewhere else.

So I say to Nhar, Have you been to Kazakhstan? and Nhar he say no. So I say to Alibek, Bon, we can go to Kazakhstan. Alibek he say we will not be unhappy because in Almaty, Kazakhstan, you have the most beautiful girl of any city in the world.

So we fly east over Italy, Slovenia, Croatia, Serbia, Romania, then oh! The Black Sea, it’s so nice water. Before long we are over the Crimea part of Ukraine, where they had a war a long time ago. Then a bit of Russia, and then, oh! We are over Kazakhstan. It’s a beautiful country, Kazakhstan. You have a lot of river, lake, mountain. Also apples. It’s also a very big country. We fly over a lot of place with not too much going on. Then, we get close to Almaty, but unfortunately we have a big weather problem. A snow storm it blow us in our helicopter off course to the south, and we have to land in the middle of Kyrgyzstan, in a snow bank on a mountain in the dark. The helicopter, it’s broken and it cannot fly. But we are OK. Except it’s very cold.

Alibek he say, I’m sorry, I have brought us here in the middle of nowhere and I don’t think we’re going to make it out.

I say don’t worry Alibek, Nhar he will think of something.  Then Nhar he look down at the snow, and he see a postcard.  It’s another postcard for our show, Cabaret Terrarium, opening this Friday, February 5 in Williamsburg, Brooklyn, New York!  This is good, because in all the confusion with the branch of the tree breaking in Switzerland, we forgot to get the postcard for our show.

Unfortunately we may now die tonight.  But it’s good to know the people of Kyrgyzstan they want to come to our show in Brooklyn.  It would be better for myself, and for Nhar, and also for Alibek and also for the people of Kyrgyzstan who want to come see our show, if we could get out of here alive and make it to our show on Friday.

Please check back tomorrow to see if we survive through this night of wind and snow.

Your friend,

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